I have been a bit quieter on the blog lately. I have not been baking at all (no Christmas treats this year – I’m just not feeling it) and I’ve only been cooking our regular meals. The one big thing going on in my life right now is my foot. I have been experiencing foot pain since the beginning of July. I had a few running events scheduled through October and I wanted to finish those and hope my foot would just heal on its own before I visited the doctor. Spoiler – it didn’t magically heal. I RARELY go to the doctor so this is something obviously causing me pain. On Nov. 17, I saw a podiatrist and like I had Google self-diagnosed myself, I have Plantar Fasciitis in my left foot.
The definition from Mayo Clinic states:
Plantar fasciitis is one of the most common causes of heel pain. It involves pain and inflammation of a thick band of tissue, called the plantar fascia, that runs across the bottom of your foot and connects your heel bone to your toes.
Plantar fasciitis commonly causes stabbing pain that usually occurs with your very first steps in the morning. Once your foot limbers up, the pain of plantar fasciitis normally decreases, but it may return after long periods of standing or after getting up from a seated position.
Plantar fasciitis is particularly common in runners. In addition, people who are overweight and those who wear shoes with inadequate support are at risk of plantar fasciitis.
So far, my prescription to hopefully cure this pain is as follows:
- Splint. Wear a splint every night to bed. The splint is at a 90 degree angle and is formed to my foot and calf muscles. It goes from the toes up to the knee pit. The reason for this is so the foot rests in a normal position every evening allowing the fascia to heal.
- Orthotic inserts. These go in my shoes and should be worn at all times for support, the doctor said I have high arches and was surprised I have never twisted my ankles.
- New shoes. I bought a pair of shoes with a lot of support and hardly any bend in them – Brooks was the brand he recommended.
- No running or walking. The doc prefers lower impact sports like cycling and weight lifting.
- Follow up appointment in a month. He did tell me it could/likely will take several months to heal my foot, even if symptoms lessen or disappear.
After I got the diagnosis and RX to heal, I had some concerns. First, no running? I had been running consistently for probably a year. It was one of my major forms of exercise. Was I going to lose all my fitness? Would I gain a bunch of weight? Would I become a sloth, gain back all of my weight, never leave my house, lose my job – ok, you can kind of see that I tend to make a mountain out of a molehill and suspect the worst things will happen and everything somersaults to a deep, dark pit.
In all actuality (things happen for a reason, right), I took this as a sign to take a break from running and doing the HIIT exercises I had been favoring to try some new things. I have been lifting weights at work 3x/week since the beginning of November, going to a cardio circuit class at our local gym and using my bike trainer at home with a Spinerval DVD. I supplement those workouts with classes if I ever get to a big city.
So far, I haven’t gained weight and in fact, my jeans feel more comfortable on me. I don’t weigh myself because see above about spiraling into the dark abyss at the smallest of things*. But I can see some definition in areas that had been softer when I was doing so much cardio. I am tinkering around with what I eat. Right now I am high protein, high(ish) carbs and lower fat. I’d like to see if anything happens if I cut out some of my dairy. I LOVE, love, love yogurt and cottage cheese. I eat both of these almost daily. I’d like to play around a bit with eliminating these or at least cutting back to see how I feel.
What I have learned – well, it has only been two weeks so I am not cured yet. Dang it.
- I really need to stay off my feet as much as possible. This goes against everything I believe in and it has been difficult. I walked a 5K with my Mom for Thanksgiving and paid for it the next couple of days.
- Jumping jacks aren’t my friend.
- I really need to be more kind to myself.
- Continue with weights and circuit training.
- Don’t be afraid to modify moves.
We have a trip planned with friends at the beginning of February to Mexico and my goals are to feel confident, feel fine with the way I look in my swimsuit and summer wardrobe, be relaxed with what I eat and drink and to have fun with my friends. I also hope to wear flip flops on the beach and not be in foot pain. Those are some pretty big goals with only two month to spare. Wish me luck. I’m sure I’ll report back.
*A little side story as to the way I tend to think the worst scenario about things. I was in a mall shopping a few weeks ago and for some unknown reason, I popped into a store where I have never shopped. I was browsing around and noticed a cute pair of jeans. Being the cheapskate I am, I went to look at the price tag. A salesgirl was nearby and said to me something like “you probably don’t want to be shopping in this section”. Immediately, I was embarrassed. I’m sure I turned bright red (why, God why do I have to have the ability to blush but not have clear skin?) and flustered. I am sure she saw in me what I see in myself – overweight, probably too old to be shopping in this store and no fashion sense. I looked up at her to apologize (of course, I would be sorry) and when we made eye contact she explained to me that I was in the plus size section of the store and nothing would probably fit me. My first thought – yeah, she is right – no way would these clothes fit me. But then, she continued on to say the non plus size section was over on the other side of the room and I’d have better luck finding something there.
I went to the other side of the store and faked looked around but I left fairly quickly. I just had about 100 different emotions go through my mind in that mere one to two-minute conversation. I felt guilt, embarrassment, shame and then happiness and almost pride? Then vanity, cluelessness and uncertainty to cover just a few. I’m not sure how to explain all of what I felt. The fact is, I do not have a super high self-confidence about myself. I don’t know if others see that, but I am quick to embarrass or be in social situations for fear I will sound or look stupid. I still see myself as the overweight girl. I don’t see myself as fitting into mainstream sizes and being “normal” (notice the quotes). Why can’t I ever be happy or satisfied? Something to work on for sure.
After a Black Friday shopping trip where I tried to explain to a woman that I love very much who was down on herself and her body issues, I realize I need to be kind to myself also. She felt fat, broad, not worthy of the clothes she was trying on. I told her there are so many women that would just kill to look like her or to have her strong legs, or whatever it might be. We all have areas on our body we don’t like -even models. We have to own what we have to work with! She was still doubtful. I guess we get these notions, ideas and doubts from other women that have gone before us. I am going to try to be better about saying the negative things about myself out loud.We need to be proud of ourselves – our bodies – our minds – our humor, whatever it might be. I do truly believe all my friends and family are beautiful and I wish they could see it. So let’s all ease up a little on ourselves.